It Will Change You in the Middle of the Day

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All the sailors
with their seasick mamas

Hear the sirens
on the shore,

Singin' songs
for pimps with tailors

Who charge ten dollars
at the door.

You can really
learn a lot that way

It will change you
in the middle of the day.

Though your confidence
may be shattered,

It doesn't matter.

All the great explorers
Are now in granite laid,

Under white sheets
for the great unveiling

At the big parade.

You can really
learn a lot that way

It will change you
in the middle of the day.

Though your confidence
may be shattered,

It doesn't matter.

All the bushleague batters
Are left to die

on the diamond.

In the stands
the home crowd scatters

For the turnstiles,

For the turnstiles,

For the turnstiles.