Thursday, February 18, 2010

Continued Legislative Pushback to SCOTUS Ruling



Democrats desperate to find a winning issue in the fall have decided to propose a bill to push back against the Supreme Court's ruling to undo years of campaign finance reform. For all the recent talk of a lack of bipartisanship and cooperation somehow having complicated and ruined the process itself, this bill finds itself with support from both sides of the aisle. Though the primary sponsors are Democrats, several Republicans have also signed on. In this election cycle, which began with a populist backlash that has only grown with time, running against a High Court which values big business over individuals is, one would think, a supremely safe position statement.

An article in yesterday's Washington Post reveals that the roots of public dissatisfaction with the recent SCOTUS decision in Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission run deep. As the paper's own polling reveals,

Eight in 10 poll respondents say they oppose the high court's Jan. 21 decision to allow unfettered corporate political spending, with 65 percent "strongly" opposed. Nearly as many backed congressional action to curb the ruling, with 72 percent in favor of reinstating limits.

The poll reveals relatively little difference of opinion on the issue among Democrats (85 percent opposed to the ruling), Republicans (76 percent) and independents (81 percent).

The results suggest a strong reservoir of bipartisan support on the issue for President Obama and congressional Democrats, who are in the midst of crafting legislation aimed at limiting the impact of the high court's decision.


The Roberts Court unfortunately reaffirmed that corporations have the same basic freedoms and rights to free speech as do individuals. The sordid history of corporate personhood began in the late Nineteenth Century and has been a contentious, divisive issue ever since. With the rise of corporations and multinational conglomerates, corporate personhood has never been far from the public consciousness. A series of rulings over time have revealed the depths of the debate.

Justices Hugo Black and William O. Douglas both rendered opinions attacking the doctrine of corporate personhood. Justice Black, in a dissenting opinion, concluded,

If the people of this nation wish to deprive the states of their sovereign rights to determine what is a fair and just tax upon corporations doing a purely local business within their own state boundaries, there is a way provided by the Constitution to accomplish this purpose. That way does not lie along the course of judicial amendment to that fundamental charter. An amendment having that purpose could be submitted by Congress as provided by the Constitution. I do not believe that the Fourteenth Amendment had that purpose, nor that the people believed it had that purpose, nor that it should be construed as having that purpose.

(Hugo Black, dissenting, Connecticut General Life Insurance Company v. Johnson (303 U.S. 77, 1938)


It remains to be seen whether this bill will be signed into law, or, assuming it is, what its greater impact will be. The recent ruling has just now taken effect and no one at this point is certain what liberties corporations might take or intend on taking in this year's election cycle. Furthermore, the Obama Administration and the Roberts Court have not yet taken highly antagonistic positions with each other the same way FDR did with the Hughes Court back in the 1930's. However, it must be noted that FDR's New Deal lead to the enactment of a variety of reforms and Obama has only managed a paltry sum in comparison. A majority desperate to minimize its losses would do well to start here.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Something Different

Because I have too much to do today, I beg you listen to my songs instead of reading a commentary. Writing to return tomorrow.

My Playlist by Cabaretic

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

The "Death" of the Parties



It seems nearly inconceivable that this time last year many were pondering, with all seriousness, as to whether or not the Republican Party was dead. What a difference a year makes. Still, the almost certain GOP gains at the end of this coming election cycle are not a result of the rebirth of a party, any party, though this will certainly be the narrative the media spins out this November. Democratic incompetence has created this unfortunate situation, just as Republican incompetence led directly to the last substantial power shift in 2006. And, in all fairness, this is usually how it happens. The party in power proves to be all talk and no action, and the opposition party runs against it and capitalizes on voter ire. This should, of course, never be confused as a mandate. The GOP has no more new ideas then it ever did.

Evan Bayh's decision yesterday to take his ball and go home was immediately taken in many corners as some centrist repudiation of President Obama's so-called "liberal" agenda. I have to say I took great offense at this argument. When was the last time centrism did anything positive for anyone? The passion and the dreams of a better society lie with Progressivism. Forgive me for believing that centrism in the context of Leftist politics is merely some middle ground created purely out of expedience, with a foot in both the liberal and the conservative, but being firmly indebted to neither. I see nothing remotely inspiring about running to be re-elected, instead of running to guide our country in the proper direction. The Democratic politicians who cite the polarized times in which we live as their reason to leave the stage do sound, for to my ears, exactly like a band of whiners, complaining how their previously cushy jobs as stewards of the peoples' trust is now challenging and time-consuming. Forgive me as I remove my violin from its case.

We might be wise to reintroduce into the discussion the ways in which liberals and liberalism set to improve conditions and level the playing field for everyone, to push back against those who still demonize the very word as proof of its ultimately destructive agenda. Bayh merely used it as a convenient excuse from an ancient script. Though Republicans may label the programs Democrats and President Obama pushed as socialistic and wasteful big government, these derogatory denunciations aren't nearly as effective as the overlying anger of not having a job, making less money at work if one is gainfully employed, a decrease in spending power, and many other discomforts that were a long time in coming and may very well be a long time gone. Everyone's hands are a bit tied in this regard, but not in all areas.

If I could impress any concept upon the presumptive voter it would be that prior attempts to change horses in mid-stream haven't necessarily made us better off. I recognize that it's our system of government that is to blame and that reforms must be made. I certainly know I'm far from the only one to make this argument. And when over a third of voters surveyed would support a third party rather than giving their allegiance and voters to the two established players, then one understand the deep well of dissatisfaction driving the political climate. Our Progressive legislators have not forsaken us. Instead, it has been the mushy centrists like Bayh who have tried to triangulate and posture to no positive end besides their own poll numbers. Allow me to qualify my remarks slightly. There will always be a need and a place for moderate voices in the Democratic Party, but this also means that Progressive voices deserve a spot at the megaphone too. If President Obama's legislative slate were really as far Left as some have characterized it, then criticisms of it would seem less vituperative. The reality is that most of them are sensible and far from some sort of imaginary radicalized Jacobinism. Myths like these need to be addressed and repudiated while at the same time we confront those who make them.

It is up to us, then, to drive the narrative forward into the fall. If we don't do it, then Democratic movers and shakers certainly will not do it for us. There are winning issues out there beyond the superficial and most of them revolve around frustration with business as usual. The party in power will always find itself drawing most of the heat in situations like these, but if we assume that we have little to no control over the health of the economy and the rate of unemployment, there are still other bread and butter issues which need to be revealed to all and then fully fleshed out. A year ago, I, like many people, believed that handing over the reigns of power was sufficient enough to accomplish the change I knew we needed. Now I recognized that I should have never placed complete faith in those with no clue how to navigate through perilous terrain. If you want something done properly, sometimes you have to do it yourself.

Monday, February 15, 2010

A Winning Election Strategy for 2010



After the 2008 election cycle advanced a long litany of proposed reforms and massive structural changes which came attached to Presidential candidate Barack Obama, 2010's agenda is much more modest. A disillusioned, frustrated electorate looks to lash out against those in power by casting their votes accordingly, hence the reason why so many long-time legislators within the party have retired in the past several months. As we know, scaled down versions of existing measures are the order of the day, and skittish Democrats are wary of making additional promises that they know they can't likely keep, aiming to avoid increased voter ire at all cost. Still, it would be foolish to cast aside all talk of additional reform, particularly since some slightly more modest proposals would likely go over well, even in this dubious climate.

Even with the severe limitations of the 2010 cycle, there are a few issues Democrats could hammer home that would resonate well with voters. Polls reveal that the recent Federal Election Commission v. Citizens United Supreme Court decision regarding campaign finance reform is a highly unpopular one, and some Democrats on the state and local level have proposed measures to push back and guard themselves from the potential sweep of corporate interference.

Maryland lawmakers are mobilizing to prepare a series of campaign finance reforms in response to a recent Supreme Court decision that will open federal elections to more corporate and labor spending.

About a dozen Democratic senators and delegates this week outlined a package of bills meant to restrict the ability of those businesses to spend in state elections.

The initiatives come after the Supreme Court's decision in Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission, which overturned a prohibition on corporations and unions using general treasury funds for political ads.

Sen. Jamie Raskin, D-Montgomery, said the legislators are working to "try and contain the damage."


It should be noted that none of these measures do a tremendous amount to reverse the decision itself and its now-established precedent, but they do provide additional safeguards in case corporations decide to take new liberties. The nightmare scenario envisioned by many is an influx of corporate-based cash into races and regions in ways that had never before existed. Thus, this proposed legislation is designed primarily to prevent business from overreaching into political races. Even so, sensible strategies like these would go over well with constituents in every state, and would give increasingly vulnerable Democrats a powerfully populist talking point. Subsequent pro-big business decisions from whatever source are likely to be viewed negatively by the American people, and if the national Democratic Party wishes to rebrand itself to keep its control of Congress, it might do well to consider strategies like these.

Running against the SCOTUS as a whole might also prove to be a winning strategy, since the latest unpopular heavily split decision reveals the undemocratic nature of a small, deliberative body who is appointed for life and cannot be collectively, individually, or otherwise voted in or voted out by the general public. We can forever debate the merits of why the Federal judicial system was set up in such a fashion, but we simply can't deny the reality of it. Voters now are concerned much more about results, not reasons. Moreover, the direct impact upon the 5-4 decision itself showed plainly in the person of the two Justices that Former President George W. Bush nominated. Democrats could once again point back to the destructive Bush Presidency as a still-evident and still-existing part of the problem. The Roberts court has not yet set itself up as directly antagonistic to President Obama and his agenda, but it very well might as time goes on, which would give the incumbent Chief Executive a weapon when the time arrives for him to run for re-election in 2012. Setting the scene early as well as the framing would make that message far more pertinent and pervasive.

Though the party in power is always under the gun when a bad economy, high unemployment, and Congressional gridlock spawn massive ill-will in the voting public, a slight modification in focus could limit losses and stem the bleeding. As it is right now, Democrats are rushing about in a million different directions with no coherent, nor cohesive sense of message discipline. As many have done before, I have criticized those in positions of authority who have either abused the peoples' trust or have frittered away a golden opportunity by their own inability to form consensus or make resounding, firm decisions. The sea change in Washington politics ushered in by an astounding 2008 cycle and an equally astounding rapid decay of many of those gains in the course of one short year has redefined previously existing parameters and expected results. Acting sooner rather than later works against the math and logic of a previous age, I recognize, but what we have all discovered recently is that significant developments of the Twenty-first Century proceed at an incredibly rapid clip, and those who jump out in front of an issue first usually fare the best. The clock is running down, but there is still plenty of time left.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Quote of the Week



"Love is but the discovery of ourselves in others, and the delight in the recognition."
-Alexander Smith

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Breaking Free of the Bubble



If we were to be fair with ourselves, we would admit that, compared to most of the rest of the world, we really do have it good. As I say this, I recognize that statements such as these have been set forth multiple times to scold those who feel no desire to contribute to some worthy cause or endeavor. I'm not really out to highlight an issue or to request a donation, nor do I seek to appeal to your latent sense of guilt. Rather, I do ask for your sober contemplation. What I say now is designed to encourage discussion and discourage argument. We have enough back-and-forth as it is and we waste so much of our energies and ourselves in the process, passion better spent focused on different avenues.

All of us live in one bubble or another. The wealthier and more privileged we are, the greater and more exclusive the bubble. Growing up in the South, as I did, my parents and the parents of my peers most often had been born into solidly working class families. It had only been through their hard work and a resulting favorable economic climate that they'd had the ability to achieve social mobility, and in so doing scale one class up the proverbial ladder. Now that I live in a city where I encounter on a regular basis people my own age who have come from a long line of relative wealth, their views and mine are often as different as our priorities. I find it quite difficult to not be jealous and envious of, for example, their multiple trips abroad to Germany or their ability to attend an elite institution (or two) of higher learning. Still, I recognize that compared to many who live in the state of my birth, I had it very easy.

When we talk about Haiti, Darfur, or the Middle East, all the usual conduits to direct money and financial assistance fall easily in place. Yet, it is rather telling that it takes a catastrophe before we give even half a second to contemplate what life must be like for those in the Third World. Whether we admit it or not, a hierarchy of need exists, and the simultaneous blessing and curse of having our own basic needs met on an almost constant basis is that we can afford to have trivial, tedious arguments of insidious intent. And what to what overwhelming question does this lead us? It's tough to say, really, but whatever it may be is frequently useless and thoroughly counter-productive.

As for our friends in dire need, their daily thoughts tend to be whether they have enough food to eat, or whether their lives will be in danger tomorrow, or how they'll manage to raise their children in a harsh, unforgiving environment. To them, our arguments would seem not just ludicrous but also completely incomprehensible. Many have talked about this concept before, too, I recognize. If I believed we had gotten the message before now I wouldn't bother reintroducing it. To be sure, I am aware that some do take this matter to heart. These are the ones who jump at the chance to volunteer to serve the less fortunate in other countries. I admire and appreciate their devotion. I do also take to heart the often-conservative criticism that we spend so much time and energy temporarily boosting the stature of devastated foreign countries while simultaneously neglecting our own poor and downtrodden. We would certainly go far to document the lives of our own needy beyond the occasional human interest story or anecdote. It's not so much where we devote our energy as it is a question of our general mindset, which must not just be a single-minded and highly time-limited desire to cross off the phrase "humanitarian effort" from our Socially Conscious™ checklist.

The problem with bubbles, of course, is that bubbles isolate. They are impermeable. They keep information from getting out and in so doing keep necessary strategies and potential means of assistance in the hands of and for the use of a small, fortunate few. In discussion with those of other nationalities, I note that they have at times expressed no small frustration with us that we in this country seem to believe that nothing happens of much importance unless it happens here, or has some direct relevance to America and Americans. If our ultimate goal was complete equality, as we say it is, then we'd make a general effort to take into account the unique stories, news, and issues of other regions and countries of the world. Put this way, these very pertinent topics wouldn't have to be consolidated into a tab labeled "World News" on one's browser, or reduced to a niche interest targeted to a niche interest group.

What we deal with primarily is a discrepancy involving money and means. Here in Northwest DC, for example, some have spent years bickering about the location of a new library and whether it should be granted zoning rights and the ability to finally break ground. Common sense alone would have dictated that the existing temporary library space is much too small to accommodate the number of patrons who use its services, meaning that the construction of the building can't get underway soon enough. Whereas, if I turn my attention towards the Southeast in the direction of Anacostia, I am faced with the blight and decay of dire poverty---with it a lack of basic services. Here, where I live, there are many restaurants and grocery stories I encounter on even the most modest of walks up and down the main thoroughfare. There, one is hard pressed to find more than one restaurant, and grocery stores are either severely limited, or nowhere to be found. This underscores how finding common means of comparison is difficult enough between people of similar interest, but in this way, both residents speak completely different languages.

I fail to take into account that many of us genuinely try to do the right thing. I've seen it for myself, many times. I'm not stating that one ought to drop everything, give all one has to the poor, and move to an impoverished country. But what I am saying is that once we leave the bubble, we don't need the novelty of a country or region in crisis to recognize that until our efforts here on these shores are a success, we simply won't have the infrastructure and the methodology in place to give better aid and assistance to foreign countries in need. If that on-going War on Poverty is ever won and won forever, it will start here, then spread to other places, not the other way around. Speaking American English in all its varieties and variations is tough enough, with so many regional, ethnic, and economic distinctions. Speaking the native tongue of another place is a daunting, if not completely impossible task until we've found our own means of translation.

Saturday Video

Friday, February 12, 2010

Message for Today

I keep saying I can't update and then I find something that screams out to be blogged. But today I mean it. I really can't. The city is beginning to melt back to normality and as such there are errands to do that previous days could not. And, I've got major cabin fever.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

ACORN Tactics Applied to Abortion Services



Recent high profile news events involving abortion rights have revealed that while the omnipresent skirmishing may temporarily subside, it doesn't take much to stir the issue into a new frenzy. The latest embarrassing public relations snafu involves the Birmingham, Alabama, Planned Parenthood clinic, which has been placed probation for a year. Before there was ACORN and young right-wing activists with visual evidence, last year a California-based anti-abortion group employed the services of an UCLA student to secretly videotape instances of wrongdoing. Posing as a 14-year-old girl seeking an clandestine abortion after getting pregnant with her 31-year-old boyfriend, the tape revealed that the worker she spoke to agreed not to report the matter, in violation of state law, and added that it might be possible to perform the procedure without the knowledge of her parents. By the time the video came to the attention of the Alabama Attorney General, the statue of limitations had passed, but it did trigger a revealing in-depth investigation via Alabama's Department of Public Health.

John A. MacDonald of The Birmingham News has the whole story.

Perhaps the most damning allegation is that the clinic has come under increasing scrutiny and fire due to new charges which allege that workers a negligently refused to report obvious instances of childhood sexual abuse.

In that potential abuse case, a 13-year-old girl reported that she became sexually active at 12 and came in for two abortions within four months. She was not asked by staff about potential abuse, and her case was not reported to authorities.

"If she was being abused, you give her a chance to be rescued from that situation," said Rick Harris, director of health pro­vider standards for the Alabama Depart­ment of Public Health.


This matter only throws hot water onto an already overheated issue. Aside from the immediate emotional appeals, explosive revelations like these reveal that local government often fails to adequately police itself internally and to follow rudimentary protocol. As for why these seemingly basic rule were not followed, perhaps the worker or workers in question at the clinic might have sought to protect at least two young women, and likely more, from the stigma and emotional turmoil of prosecution and a trial by jury. Indeed, our own initial responses might be to cover up or skirt past tragic situations like these out of sympathy for the victim or out of our own desire to not have to think about them. Some may consider tactics like those tantamount to cowardice or sloth, and there is an strong argument to be made for that as well. But no matter what justification and rationalization may be provided, state law does require those who observe cases of flagrant child sexual abuse to report them immediately to the proper channels. So many of these cases are not reported enough already and this is, in part, the reason why these sorts of offenses are shockingly prevalent in our supposedly civilized society.

In nine out of nine cases tested, the clinic did not get girls ages 13-15 to authenticate the signature of the parent providing con­sent for the abortion. In one case, the person who signed the consent for a 15-year-old girl provided an expired driver's license of a person with a different last name and address from the girl's. A subsequent review of Alabama birth records showed that person was not listed as a parent.


The pattern that emerges here is that of gross incompetence and dereliction of duty rather than some sort of willful desire to broach protocol and skirt the law. I doubt that anyone holds such a radical agenda that they would choose to violate parent notification rules and in so doing, fail to adequately check identities before proceeding. While I have always believed that requiring parental consent before an abortion can be performed unfairly restricts a woman's right to choose, ANY woman's right to choose, I am deeply uncomfortable with the notion of civil disobedience at the workplace in this context. There is lots of blame to go around, but I point the finger at the system itself. I think the most likely is that what transpired over time is that women would arrive without the necessary paperwork to move forward and after observing much delay in extracting the necessary signatures and confirmation needed in prior cases, clinic workers eventually overlooked them to expedite the process and make their own jobs easier.

One can form any number of conclusions based on the available information. Anti-choice proponents will surely use this story to confirmation of their own views in this and those of us who are pro-choice may, as I do, find it hard to easily make sense of this. I seek not to be an apologist for this kind of behavior, specifically because it makes women's reproductive rights and abortion services agencies look foolish and incompetent. But what it does highlight, however, is how uncomfortable we are when it comes to frank discussions about abortion. We can screech and yell about baby killers or those who murder abortionists, but we rarely really talk about the lives of individual women who find themselves faced with a grave situation---presented with the unenviable option of either terminating their pregnancy or bringing a child into the world. If we, as part of our 9-5 job, sat across the desk from a child whose pregnancy clearly resulted from a case of incest or rape, it would be tempting to wish to spare her from any subsequent trauma. Since a strong taboo already is in place regarding these sorts of crimes, it would be easier to simply take the path of least resistance.

The story also implies that sad tales like these are hardly unusual. To this I add that anyone who has dealt with our convoluted legal system knows that justice, assuming it eventually arrives, is not exactly a precise, timely affair. Court dockets have long been swelled past capacity, trials routinely last weeks on end, and moreover the emotional stress involved with lawyers, fees, strategies, and the massive amount of hoops to jump through make the process thoroughly exhausting for everyone involved. Though I do not absolve the Planned Parenthood workers for refusing to follow their job descriptions and adhere to the letter of the law, I do recognize that often existing systems are so ridiculously complex and set in place to patch a hole, not for the ease of implementation.

After a time this encourages people to take short cuts. If we ever really wished to devise a world that was fairer and more efficient, we'd adopt a system whereby the only rules we imposed were those absolutely necessary. As it stands now, if one person breaks a rule, everyone else is punished by having to adhere to a new regulation or restrictive standard. Good management punishes, and if need be, removes the individual offender, not the collective body. Pushing aside for a moment our own passionate defenses, we can learn from ACORN and Planned Parenthood if this pushes us to closely re-examine whether rules, regulations, standards, and statutes really make our lives easier, or burden us to the point that we'd just as soon ignore them wholesale.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

What DC Needs

Mainstream Female Columnists Fail Men and Women Equally



Many bloggers, including me, have expressed frequent consternation at the lack of substantive female voices in the mainstream media. On that note, there are times when I wonder what both Kathleen Parker and Maureen Dowd are both smoking and inhaling. Tweedledum and Tweedledee routinely write columns crafted with such a flagrant disregard for coherence or original analysis that I wonder how they even ended up with a job. Both of these writers are supposed to be the apex of serious journalism and with it the mouthpiece of womanhood and womens' concerns. It seems as though both conservative and liberal women are getting the short end of the stick, though I'm hardly surprised at the revelation. And it isn't just women who are suffering from such inadequacy.

Martin Austermuhle, writing today at dcist, points out the sloppy logic of Parker's latest column in The Washington Post.


Parker asserts that shoveling is something men just need to do, like it's hard-wired into our genetic code. "What do men want?" she asks. "Shovels. Men want shovels, the bigger the better," she responds.

"Women can't be blamed for wanting to be independent and self-sufficient, but smart ones have done so without diminishing the males whose shoulders they might prefer on imperfect days. Add to the cultural shifts our recent economic woes, which have left more men than women without jobs, and men are all the more riveted by opportunities to be useful," she observes.

According to her profound analysis on the matter, the minute we simple-minded men see a flake of snow, we go running to the nearest shovel. "Man is never happier than when he is called to action, in other words. That is to say, when he is needed," she posits. Of course, she does add that women will shovel, but she only admits as much to avoid "sexist stereotyping." Yeah. That's like prefacing a homophobic joke by saying, "But some of my best friends are gay!"


I frequently use personal examples in my posts and diary entries, but I am always careful to try to use facts and other sources to bolster my claims. There is great power in the personal, but Parker proves that the personal can be used very wrongly to stand in for objective truth. Ignoring societal conditioning in favor of innate biological programming is a tactic frequently employed by the Right, particularly as a means of keeping gender distinctions frozen in time. Even so, there are a few undeniable elements of our behavior that must be chalked up to the undeniable fact that some of us have two X chromosomes and some of us only have one. Yet, relying too heavily on that fact fails to take into account that we are distinct from other animals in that we have highly advanced brains and reasoning abilities. Since the beginning of time, humankind has been imposing its own version of reality beyond purely biological imperative and survival instinct.

The feud between Parker and Dowd is well-documented and I don't need to add much more to it. Unsurprisingly, both columnists manage to miss the point altogether when they cobble together a collection of stale arguments and pseudoscience to make their case. They end up on opposite ends of a great existential divide, managing to be equally wrong in the process. Contrary to what Dowd says, men are necessary, but it should be added that they are necessary in ways beyond shoveling driveways or providing emergency manual labor. Contrary to what Parker says, it's not biologically determined that men are born snow shovelers and ditch diggers.

Later in the column, Parker at least makes an effort to try to state that she isn't homophobic or dismissive of the fact that gay men are equally capable of being "masculine", but the conclusion she draws is bizarre, at best. If it wasn't so strangely rendered, I might take more offense to what it implies.


As for Craig, he's been happy the past 25 years with Jack, who, though he pleads a bad back, cooks a mean stroganoff, from which I have benefited twice since the snows began.

Doubtless, such displays of manliness -- which in my view include feeding the hungry -- are, like the weather, passing divertissements. And these jottings are but a wee contribution to the annals of gender study. But if one should ever stop pondering the malaise of modern woman long enough to consider what men might want, the answer is obvious to any except, perhaps, the U.S. Congress.

Give a man a job, and he'll clear a path to your door.


Her convoluted conclusion seems to be that women have focused too selfishly on their own empowerment that they've failed to understand or appreciate the contributions of men. With it comes an underlying assumption that men feel confused these days because their time-honored roles in society have been somehow denigrated or tarnished since women started demanding equal rights, equal pay, and basic equality. If only things were this simple. If only women had anything remotely close to the same degree of parity with men. If only, for example, there was some set standard of what all men wanted or what all women wanted, for that matter.

One can't just make a blanket statement based on absolutes. Men are not some monolithic entity any more than women are. Surveying the women and men with whom we work, live, and interact will reveal that gender distinctions are not distributed exactly the same for everyone. In that spirit, it is equally wrong-headed to reduce men to violent brutes or women to flighty fashionistas. A major problem everyone faces is that we are forced to conform to gender roles that are designed for one-size-fits-all settings when we are all different sizes, shapes, and proportions. If gender were a set of clothes, we'd be tugging on it constantly, hoping that with enough effort it eventually would cover us properly. And so long as we impose simplistic identity upon complex humanity, it never will quite work.

The major problem at play here is that Feminist groups and women's rights groups tend to often to couch their analysis in overly-academic terms. I can vouch for this personally. This means that pop-feminist analysis like Parker and Dowd ends up shaping the perception of most people, as though these sorts of stilted descriptions are some objective picture of the way things really are. But these two aren't even the worst offenders. At least these columnists usually mean well and usually at least aim high. Meanwhile, aside from "serious" analysis, a perversion of Feminism leads women to believe that there is something empowering in being publicly sexual or in adopting the same pose of their chauvinistic brethren. Objectification by any other name, this is an attitude reflected ever more frequently in popular culture. But instead of focusing on whether or not it's a good thing that now Tween aged girls are dressing provocatively rather than like the children that they are, or whether we're including people of color into our depictions of feminine identity, or whether transgender citizens are treated with the respect they deserve, instead we get into the eternal back and forth about whether the cause of women's rights has done more harm than good and whether men are suffering as a result.

This degree of navel-gazing does no one any good. Periodically, it might be helpful if we engaged in a respectable dialogue about how far the rights of women have come, where the movement is headed, and what we all might take from it. However, if this territory is mined constantly without anything especially novel or even interesting to report from it, then we forget that there's much more to Feminism and gender equality than the tit-for-tat that never ends. Gender is a construct of the human mind and it is so pervasive that its impact effects us in ways that are both exceptionally glaring and maddeningly minute. The complexities of civilization and the human mind have given rise to a huge amount of interrelated information to be combed through, but if we fail to survey it in totality, then it does us no good. The mysteries of men and women will remain so forever. We might not solve them all, but we'd be a damn sight closer to a greater understanding than we are now, instead of focusing so narrowly on one particularly yawn-inducing issue.

Greetings from Siberia!




As I write this to you roughly as of 9:30 am local time, the phrases white-out, blowing snow, and blizzard conditions would be apt descriptions. Likewise, I estimate 8 inches of new snow is on the ground, though it is difficult to say for sure because the winds are howling so hard that visibility is almost nil.

Since most of my posts have a political focus, and since this entire city has largely been at a standstill for the whole week, I really have nothing to say today. I'm mainly hoping I don't lose power.

Take care, everyone! Once everything returns to normal, I'll be back to my usual loquacious self.

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Sorry I'm Late Today

I've been rushing around for massive snowfall, part two.

Please accept this performance video as penance.

Monday, February 08, 2010

Contrary to Some Voices, Masculinity is Not Under Attack



I write this post in response to a handful of Super Bowl commercials that I write this post in response to two or three Super Bowl commercials that aired last night. The implication in each of them, to some degree or another, was that masculinity was under attack, the ravages of femininity were destroying machismo, or that marriage was an emasculating process that turned male virility into weak-kneed passivity. These views are nothing new, but when they are emphasized so heavily, the general implication is quite clear. Some must believe that men are losing control of the game and being transformed into, if not women, some hybrid form which is itself a cheap imitation to the rough and tough masculinity of the past. Knee-jerk responses neglect to understand that in the process of achieving equality for everyone, masculinity will change in direct proportion to the way femininity has changed. The truth is that nothing is being lost and everything is being gained, but some confuse the cause of reform with tragic destruction of the tried-and-true.

If I didn't know better, I might buy into these wrong-headed assertions myself. However, I happen to recognize that while an older incarnation of masculinity might have been less compelled towards public displays of sensitivity or equal deference to relationship partners, this kind of supposed supreme self-reliance also meant that men were often incapable of sharing vulnerability and thus expressing the fullest range of human expression. Problems best talked out and shared with others were frequently kept inside, often disguised or numbed away by alcohol or other drugs. I suppose having had a grandfather who likely struggled with bipolar himself, one who, I might add, never really ever came to terms with what he considered a shameful weakness, does makes me understand his struggle without rushing to judgment as some might do. I don't romanticize the masculinity of another age. I pity it. To me it is supremely limiting and heavily stunted. Why anyone would wish to reinforce masculinity in such rigid, lonely terms is beyond me.

When we talk about a Patriarchal society, we mean a societal framework designed by (usually white) men for other (usually white) men. The scope of Patriarchy is vast and at times so invasive and omnipresent that one has a difficult time adequately stating its fullest impact upon all. Feminist voices for years have taken much time pointing out Patriarchy's shortcomings, especially how it callously disenfranchised women by forcing them to play by the parameters and rules of a system for which they were often ill-suited. Their criticism, which is quite valid, states that if men were capable of designing such a fantastic system, why then does it produce so many unresolved problems? More recently, Feminists have fought for the inclusion and incorporation of people of color, LGBTs, and other minority voices into the discussion. It is my opinion, based on what I have observed, that any system which does not take into account multiple points of view and the unique concerns of a wide swath of people across the board will always remain imperfect and inequal. The deepest irony of all is that the Paternalistic system as it exists now works for the well-heeled, powerful, and well-connected at the expense of almost everyone else imaginable, so many men now terrified at its supposed demise are the very same who are ground underfoot by it.

The radical Feminists of a generation prior envisioned a superior, alternate system designed by women, but the failing in that point of view is that by being just as exclusionary as their male brethren, they managed to perpetuate only a brand new spin on the same problems. Though I am a man, I do not find any discomfort whatsoever in spaces dominated by women, because unlike some of my same gender, I do not see gender equality as a zero sum game. Inherent in each of those Super Bowl commercials was that belief---that in surrendering to the desires of women, they would be losing their masculinity and freedom in the process. My hope is that other men will come to understand, as I have, that everyone's liberation depends on maximum participation by everyone. This includes participation in spaces, circles, and movements not often populated by white men, or, for that matter, men at all. Still, so long as the way things have always been finds itself threatened, the same old appeals to some standard of masculine purity will be invoked. The paradoxically unifying feature of gender inequality is that both male and female gender roles are defined as the pursuit of a kind of perfect balance that is beyond the grasp of everyone, regardless of gender identification. Still, it is invoked frequently to chide or to lecture people to get back in line, else some kind of anarchic chaos result from it.

We know where we're headed, and we also know that every age presents its own challenges and its own problems. It is easier to declare a war and invoke a moral panic than to calmly examine the reality of the situation before us. Whether it's sexting or some perceived attack on masculine strength and independence, we ought to expect the same sorts of attacks until the end. Names change, context differs, the sales pitch is modified slightly, but in the end, it's really no different. The goal is to plan for the inevitable, hope for the best, and make sure to never relinquish control of the framing. Reform and the need for reform of any sort and in any context is ceaseless. Let us cogently articulate our reservations, discuss our strategies, put them into action, and then wait for the next volley from the other side. In the meantime, I fight alongside my sisters as well as my brothers and do so happily and with great purpose.

All Apologies



Now that the impact of the snow has subsided a little, I have crucial errands to run like buying more groceries. This will likely impede if not prevent me from posting today, so please pardon. I'm trying to get back into my daily routine. What really concerns me is that we're now predicted to get anywhere from 3-6 additional inches on top of what we have already received tomorrow night into Wednesday, making a messy situation even messier.

Sunday, February 07, 2010

Quote of the Week




I'm a riddle in nine syllables.
An elephant, a ponderous house,
A melon strolling on two tendrils.
O red fruit, ivory, fine timbers!
This loaf's big with its yeasty rising.
Money's new-minted in this fat purse.
I'm a means, a stage, a cow in calf.
I've eaten a bag of green apples,
Boarded the train there's no getting off.

-Sylvia Plath. "Metaphors".

Saturday, February 06, 2010

Snow Pictures!






Keeping Expectations of Leadership in Check




It is a truism that leaders are few and followers are numerous. This is itself an inequality that we don't often contemplate, nor feel any compulsion to amend by direct action. No flurry of blog postings or activist group with a message statement to convey has ever proposed that we ought to consider revising this important discrepancy. This may be because the gap itself is likely a construct of biology, for whatever reason. One wishes perhaps the numbers would be a bit more balanced, certainly not flip-flopped, since if most of us were leaders, we'd never get anything accomplished. In that regard, herding cats might be putting it lightly. Still, as it stands, for whatever reason, those who lead hold minority status and as such they often easily manage to attract followers to their causes and private bandwagon. It is another paradox of human behavior that while most minorities find reduced numbers much to their detriment, those who lead find the fact that they are relatively few in number much to their benefit.

We always seem to return to the example of the Great Man or Great Woman, the almost superhuman being who through his or her personal skill fixes all outstanding problems and provides mass unity. We should really know better than to expect that one single person could save us from ourselves, but to some extent, it isn't surprising why can so easily opt for this belief. Two thousand plus years of a Christ-centered framework leads us to expect that a Messiah will rescue us, whether we acknowledge it consciously or not. This is true whether we're Christian, Jewish, or not a person of faith at all. I myself recognize that I'm still waiting for Jesus to return, and would gladly fall at his feet to offer my assistance if I knew for certain he had returned. If the Second Coming arrived, some would doubt to the very end, some would desire proof, and some would resist altogether purely for their own reasons. Many, however, would breathe a sigh of relief, and quickly fall in line behind him.

Recent developments with political leaders have showed what happens when power corrupts, temptation leads to bad decisions, or disappointment sets in when high hopes are not realized. There is certainly enough fault to spread around if we seek to assign blame. However, that is not exactly my intent with this post. Nor am I seeking to absolve those who let their own shortcomings destroy the good will and good stead they formerly held. With power, charisma, and charm comes temptation of all kinds--monetary gain and sexual gratification only but two of them. I seek to bring light, in part, to the fact that those in leadership roles who court the adoration of the crowds, instantly reap all the benefits and all of the drawbacks in the process. If I, for example, stand up before an attentive audience and impress them with the cogency of my arguments, the eloquence of my rhetoric, or otherwise strike a nerve, I can expect to receive compliments, flirtatious glances or conversation, and an instant kind of immediate attention and personal favor with those who until a moment before were complete strangers. Everyone wants to be my friend, at least for that moment.

A close associate is fond of advancing a particular theory concerning this phenomenon. His example concerns the immediacy of live music, but it works well in this context, too. As he puts it, the reason we find it so easy to be attracted to to musicians, in particular, is that we see our own best qualities reflected in whomever is singing or playing. A powerful emotional intimacy is present in that moment that perhaps speaks more to us and our condition than to those on stage. This concept may wash over political leaders as well, particularly when on the stump, particularly when their personal charisma renders them something close to celebrity. They inspire so much in us: adoration, trust, envy, hope, desire, and so on. That we would entrust them so willingly with all of these in the blink of an eye makes me wonder how anyone who stands out in front can survive for long, with or without the benefit of handlers. It takes a tremendously strong person to not succumb to distraction, properly handle the stress, stay on message, and not get waylaid by a thousand wild goose chases. It is precisely our demands upon which they must conform and though they never are allowed to forget, this doesn't mean that they're always in the easiest position to respond. We expect much in return for our trust and our affections and the conditions of the transaction are both numerous and exacting.

So long as we expect perfection from our leaders, we can never see them for their gloriously flawed humanity and never forgive them for their frailties. We sometimes treat these figures as though they were our lover, one which always must say the right thing at the right time and halfway read our minds. Assuming they were the keeper of our heart, we would then need to concede that we would need to love them not just for their best qualities, but also for their worst. We can easily be dismayed, demoralized, and distressed at the behavior and conduct of those we idolize, certainly, but forgiveness is a concept ultimately foreign to us far too often. If it arrives, it arrives late, if ever at all, and it is yielded grudgingly. How often have I "forgiven" someone by mentioning, "Well, I'll forgive you this once, but you better not do it again, or I'll never speak to you again".

This ought not excuse mediocrity, philandering, or a distressing turn towards hypocrisy, but it might better explain a bit better some of the hypocrisies buried within our minds. We often say we'd never want to be a celebrity, a politician, or anyone with the same degree of constant media exposure and with it a fishbowl work environment, but many of us would also jump at the chance if it were available to us someday. I'm not so much advancing a notion that we ought to Leave People in the Public Eye Alone™ but that we need to look within ourselves and examine why we thrust so much of our entire selves, dreams, and aspirations towards whomever might have ability, courage, or God-given talents of oratory and authenticity. They certainly use our faith in them for their own benefit, as is part of the beast, and hopefully never forget the potency of the dreams of thousands upon thousands. If this truly were a relationship rather than a social contract, there would be disturbingly equal proportions of sadism and masochism present.

As it stands now, this compact is a curious kind of two-step, whereby we give all of ourselves to whomever represents us formally, with the requisite number of strings attached that we put in place in an effort that ensure that our personal wish list is followed without in order and without flaw. As for those who would lead or stand out from the pack, raising the bar high, be it in music, entertainment, or politics sets a huge precedent in place and some can rise to the challenge by hitting another home run out of the park, though many fall short. It would seem, then, that the responsibility to keep things in proper proportion is everyone's. We may not be able to close the gap regarding the number of those who lead versus those who follow, but we can make strides toward adopting a much more feasible strategy, one that would lead to fewer headaches and fewer feelings of betrayal. To me, forgiveness could be a solution. And by this I don't mean forgiveness for selfish reasons like the ability to successfully cross off another item on a voluminous to-do list, but forgiveness out of a realization that doing so would encourage true healing. True healing leads to group health. If Jesus does return someday, he would expect nothing less.

Saturday Song

This Saturday song was actually posted Friday, being that the impeding huge snowstorm might impede my ability to put it up here in time or at all.

Friday, February 05, 2010

While I'm Rushing About, A Poem

Hello Readers,

I've had to adjust my life around the arrival of the giant snowstorm predicted to begin here somewhere between late morning and mid-afternoon, so I don't really have time for a full post. What I will leave you with, however, is a poem I wrote about a year ago. It is both one of my favorites and has been well-received when read it aloud in front of an audience. Long-time regular readers please pardon the redundancy, though you may notice I added a few subtle flourishes here and there.

Those who live in the DC area will best pick up on the subtleties, but in fairness everyone who rides public transportation on a regular basis will hopefully see the humor. To read this poem literally would be to miss its fullest intent. The point is not to mock the disabled or afflicted, but rather to highlight the attitudes we form out of our own discomfort with unfamiliar company and with it our instantaneous emotional responses, which are rarely tolerant.
_________________

bad company
usually comes in
the form of men

with ornate and
highly visible forearm
tattoos

invariably sacrilegious

leering vacantly
mouths open

identical to the way
you're afraid you look

while (you can't
quite help yourself)

gazing across
the seats at the latest
attractive stranger

they hunch forward
head bowed
elbows resting heavily

on knees (observing the
posture alone
might
nearly be
confused as prayer)

talking incoherently
out of the
sides of their mouths

making
women nervous enough
to clutch their purses

reassuringly tighter
to them

while shifting their bodies
on the seat
two inches closer to a

poster advertising
the merits of a
social service agency

or recently held marathon
intended to cure
a childhood disease

one could (I suppose)
stare back
but it would have no
effect whatsoever

all bad company understands
is the evils of
institutionalized food

and the acquisition of
loose change

have no fear

soon they'll leave
ambling out at the most
unlikely stop imaginable

forcing one
to think up a new game

Thursday, February 04, 2010

Is Bi-Partisanship Good for the Voting Public?



As proposed while still a candidate, President Obama's version of bipartisanship envisioned a kind of Utopian ideal where reaching across the aisle would be a frequent gesture, not just an occasional product of odd bedfellows. My own interpretation of the concept is not nearly so pie-in-the-sky as much as it is practical in theory. Of course, I never expect to see it implemented because legislators hardly ever do anything practical these days, in theory or not. My modest proposal would seek to level the playing field between parties, particularly on a state-by-state basis, since even though running up the score might be satisfying to some, everyone at heart loves a close game. True party parity would certainly strike fear into the lovers of the status quo and the current office holders themselves, but the past several months have proven to me that many of the current batch of bumbling idiots are long past their shelf life and need to be thrown out altogether.

Though a handful of so-called purple states exist in this country, most states give primary allegiance to either one party or the other. As we know, the South is usually reliably GOP by default and the Northeast usually Democratic. I recognize that due to recent electoral decisions we know that this is not always the case, but taking into account the whole picture, this statement is largely accurate. The battles we fight with each other these days are partially a result of how we have dug in, trench warfare style, facing across an literally invisible, but still nonetheless highly perceptible partition. Purple states are certainly more prevalent now than at any other time before in our history, but their development is relatively slow and since government is indebted most strongly to historical precedent, particular when one observes the tortured and convoluted congressional and state districting schemes, the blue state/red state divide is still very much with us. Indeed, I cannot for the life of me envision a point where it will give way to something else altogether, though I would certainly rejoice if it were.

When any region or state calcifies around a particular party allegiance, competition for available seats is minimal and new blood rarely gets the chance to serve the people. In both red and blue states, running for elective office often requires one to wait for an existing Representative or Senator to die, whether they be in the State legislature or the U.S. Congress. While I of course recognize that my allegiance to the Democratic party is paramount in my affections, I also know that true democracy rarely makes any headway with de facto lifetime appointments of any legislative body. That sort of arrangement is for something else altogether and if we are to preserve the checks and balances of our Founders, we would be wise to start here. The bipartisanship I strive for would be something close to equality between each state party in representation, redistricting, and in funds. Even putting one of these proposals into effect would make a difference. To be sure, I don't deceive myself. This would face stiff opposition from all sides and even if it were seriously considered, likely not much would come of it. Still, we need to at least contemplate resolutions like this, even if they may not be workable in reality because they are the only way we're going to be able to begin to get the system to work for us, not against us from here on out.

One of the many ironies is that one would think that Republicans would embrace this plan, since it falls in line with their pro-private sector, pro-capitalist ideal. In a pure, unadulterated capitalist system, competition and innovation is essential to the success of the market and the economy. What's good for the goose must surely be good for the gander. Surely the GOP couldn't find much objectionable in this, my most modest proposal. Even so, many entrenched GOP movers and shakers would counter this suggestion by substituting term limits instead. To me, however, term limits would be a poor substitute and be far from effective, which is why I have always opposed them outright. If one never changes the political landscape of a state or a region, all term limits would really do is hand the baton off to another person of the same stripes and ideological identification. In that case it would merely be the latest example of "meet the new boss, same as the old boss".

If we really could manage something close to legislative and party parity, then it would be much easier to hold the feet of politicians to the fire. Certainly they would have to worry more about losing their seat and undeniably they would need to pay closer attention to constituent needs, but I don't think either of those outcomes are a bad thing. As it stands now, we have a still-majority, veteran Democratic caucus in the Senate who seem quite content to place its own needs and priorities above those of the average American citizen. If every Representative or Senator, regardless of party, recognized that unless Congress or any state legislative body produced clear cut legislative success that they were likely to no longer have a seat, then I daresay we probably would see some real reforms for a change. If members of both parties had to fear being booted out on not just or or two but every election cycle, we wouldn't see a constant tit-for-tat between Republicans and Democrats, nor any of these exasperating back and forth power swaps whereby the party in power obtains majority status purely by capitalizing on the mistakes of the opposite party, not by actually doing anything to win control based on merit. A drawback in this system would be that it would be easier for competent elected representatives to be swept out based on the irrational demands of an angry electorate, one much like the Tea Party members prevalent now, but much of life is some combination of luck and chance and why should politics be any different?

If we are a massively diverse plurality society of differing and competing points of view, I see more, not less gridlock and more demoralizing legislative defeats in our future. Arguably a lack of across-the-board equality in so many different areas is responsible for everything from crime to bigotry. We have underscored and articulated the problem time and time again and have gotten no further to really going after the real causes. Doing so would require unselfishness and sacrifice, of course, two qualities that are always in short supply. But what I do know is that we can't keep doing the same thing we've always done and expect a different result. I do believe in the power of reform, but I do also recognize how change often is a product of desperation and last-ditch-effort; I don't want things to get that bad before we really act. I'm not sure how much more dysfunctional our government needs to get before we adopt new strategies that will return power to the hands of an informed citizenry. The system failed us, certainly, but we are supposed to be the ones whose active hand in the proceedings puts us and everyone back on course. How we do it is not nearly as important as when we do it. I hope that day is soon.

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Real Contentment Never Has to Settle for Good Enough



Being that we are growing closer and closer to Valentine's Day, the supposedly most romantic (or depressing) of all holidays, I'd like to branch out a bit and take on a different topic than the norm today. NPR commentator Lori Gottlieb has just released a book entitled Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough. In it, Gottlieb insists that a generation of contradictory messages and empowering commandments largely advanced by Feminism have prevented women from choosing a more-than-adequate husband when the opportunity presents itself. Instead, as Gottlieb suggests, such pronouncements have encouraged women to hold out for the perfect mate. Liesl Schillinger's review of the book in The Daily Beast summarizes and echoes my own response to a very incendiary text.

The way she sees it, as she explains in a chapter called, “How Feminism F****d Up My Love Life,” a generation of women (or should I say ‘girls’?) who ought to have been taught—like their great-grandmothers and like women in Taliban-era Afghanistan—to be demure in deportment and modest in aspiration, were tricked by the women’s movement into “ego-tripping themselves out of romantic connection.” That’s right girls: If you’re unwillingly unwed, blame it on mom and Title IX for duping you into educating, respecting and supporting yourselves. She intends this book, she writes, as a blood-chilling cautionary tale, “like those graphic anti-drunk driving public service announcements that show people crashing into poles and getting killed.”


Even I, as a man, take issue with many of Gottlieb's conclusions and rather glib pronouncements because they seem to reflect personal experience more than abject truth. A variety of factors besides luck, personality, and presentation determine our success at the often-infuriating dating game. Gottlieb's analysis never takes into account rudimentary and simplistic variables that cast doubt as to the veracity of her entire work as a whole. Of all of the areas she neglects to take into account, that which comes to mind first is location.

In Washington, DC, my adopted home, one gratefully finds a vast amount of young adults like me in their twenties and thirties. A disproportionate share of them are female, which means that the competition for available men can be fairly fierce, if not deeply frustrating at times. A 2006 Washington Post article confirms this.

The U.S. government has confirmed what we single women in Washington have known for some time -- there are no single men in the District. Or, more precisely, not enough single men in the District.

According to the Census Bureau's recently released 2005 American Community Survey, the District has the lowest -- read, worst -- ratio of single men to single women in the nation. For every 100 single women in Washington, there are only 93.4 men. That's just over nine-tenths of a man for every woman. Now, if you've been single for as long as I have in this town, nine-tenths of a man is starting to sound pretty good.


Further compounding this struggle is that the stereotypical Washingtonian male is heavily Type A, married to his job, bereft of an actual personality outside of his occupation, and inclined to frequently take his work home with him, both literally and figuratively. Speaking purely from my own experiences, my girlfriend jokes that she had to import me from elsewhere, since many prior experiences finding a suitable relationship partner had been dismal. I wasn't aware of how common the problem was until, while at dinner one night, each of her female friends seated around the table mentioned they'd had the same exact problem. If we're to take Gottlieb at face value, then these women ought to put the blame at the feet of Feminism or at the dissolution of the traditional ways of courting.

This inequality in gender distribution also reflects the percentage of married couples in the DC Metro area.

According to a recent Pew Research study, the District of Columbia has the lowest marriage rate in the country. Only 23 percent of women and 28 percent of men and in D.C. are married, compared to 48 and 52 percent nationwide. The rates in D.C. are so low that they lie entirely off the Pew map’s color key. The closest states to D.C.’s numbers are Rhode Island, where 43 percent of women are married, and Alaska, where 47 percent of men are married.

Why aren’t D.C. residents getting hitched?

The Pew poll offers up one possibly related figure: residents of D.C. get married significantly later in life than do the residents of the 50 states. In D.C., the median age at first marriage is 30 for women and 32 for men. In contrast, the median age for a first marriage in the state of Idaho is 24 for women and 25 for men.


In the suburban, middle class, predominantly white city in Alabama where I grew up, most in my age range got married either in their early twenties or at least by their mid-twenties. When it came time for my tenth high school reunion this past August, I noticed by a quick survey of the Facebook page thoughtfully created for the event that roughly 60%-70% of my class had already gotten married. Of those, based on my own research, it appeared that 40% of my female classmates had given birth to at least one child. To say that I didn't quite fit in to the prevailing demographics would be putting it exceedingly lightly.

To return to Schillinger's analysis,


A woman doesn’t always find it easy to persevere in a tepid affair once it’s actual, not notional. And a man doesn’t have to be handsome to bolt—or to take umbrage at the suspicion that he’s being “settled” for. Perhaps in the future, in an over-perfected, suspense-less, Gattaca universe, men will come with LED displays on their foreheads that read: “I mean business” or “I’m deliberately wasting your time,” or, “Actually, I’m gay,” or “I’ll marry you, but we’ll loathe each other and I’ll leave you for a 20-year old when you’re 37.” Until that day comes, one wonders how Gottlieb can be so emphatic in her pronouncements, so blistering in her blame of single women for being entitled and picky in their 20s, and “desperate but picky” thereafter.


I wouldn't at all encourage anyone, male or female, gay or straight (or somewhere in between), cisgender or transgender, to find much helpful or worthy of emulation in the traditional strategies regarding marriage and/or settling down that are prevalent in the region of my birth. Had I been born in the rural South rather than the city South, most people in my high school class would be married by now and many would probably have had at least one child well before the age of thirty. I've often been a proponent of waiting and using extreme caution before jumping into marriage or parenthood---both require a tremendous amount of patience, maturity, and energy. As such, I take tremendous offense to Gottlieb's bitter hypothesis, since I doubt she'd be any happier with three kids, a mortgage, and a lingering sense of doubt that she'd tossed aside the freedom of adulthood for the supposed contentment of marriage and motherhood. Between the fear of spinsterhood and the fear of being forced into a role of great responsibility at too early an age rests the reality. Life promises us nothing but the chance to roll the dice or play a hand at the table. Both sides of the coin, be it a lifetime of cats as companions or PTA meetings and dirty diapers are not necessarily the only two expected outcomes from which women can choose.

Schillinger concludes,

There’s such a thing as luck, and there’s such a thing as love. Sometimes the two forces combine, sometimes, they don’t. If luck and love had combined for Gottlieb, today she might be a housewife in Teaneck with an SUV of her own, two kids and a mortgage, and she would not have had the need or the time to have built her fabulous career, or to have written this whining, corrosive, capricious book. Now there’s a happy ending. But for anyone who dares order millions of people she doesn’t know to sell out their dreams, regret their accomplishments, fear their futures and “Marry him,” whoever he is, I have two words: You first.


Though I, as a man don't quite feel the same societal compulsion to marry, I will mention in all seriousness that I always craved the stability and the solid grounding of, if not marriage, certainly a long-term relationship. Though I am nearly thirty, I spent most of my twenties being ahead of the learning curve, and my expectations were always severely tempered by prior relationship partners who wanted only to have fun and to not entertain anything particularly serious. Now, finally, what I want and have wanted for a while is more in line with others my age, but in saying this, I would never make the assumption that every presumably heterosexual woman in her early thirties and beyond who isn't married is desperate to find a husband and start a family. This is certainly true with some, but not all. Not even close. Believing what Gottlieb has to say means that we must take her overblown postulates and acerbic suppositions at face value without expanding them beyond a very narrow sample of the population.

No successful movement is instantly realized upon enactment. Establishing greater equality for women at times looks a little raggedy and uneven because change doesn't happen overnight. Like Gottlieb, it is easy to confuse states of transition with proof of their ultimate dysfunction. It doesn't take a leap of faith to trust that gender equality is inevitable, but it does take an open mind and with it quite a bit of patience to recognize that no unfinished work in progress will find its way onto the walls of an art gallery as an unquestioned masterpiece. This same kind of buyer's remorse I see from time to time in books like Gottlieb's, each of which reflects the same basic frustration and fear that irrefutable results for generations worth of effort are never going to manifest themselves and that these sorts of struggles have created more problems than solutions. Again, I counter that true contentment lies within the self, not necessarily within the parameters of any movement. Each of us has more control over ourselves than over any progressive construct of seeking cultural evolution. Look within the movement as a whole if you want to know where to leave your mark, but look within yourself if you want to find a relationship partner. Never confuse the two.

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

No Time to Post Today!

So instead, I leave you with this.

Right or Wrong

Ten years ahead of time
Or about one year behind

Sometimes it tends to get to me
But don't defy the hand

that leads to the light
of renown

it's a battle that won't
make any sound

either you're with us
or you're not

sometimes lately I just want
to be caught.

Right or Wrong
we're breaking their hearts again

wonder what you're
waiting for?

Right or Wrong
we're breaking their hearts again.

this one's for the girls
there's no particular one in the world

until I got glimpse of what could be
was shocked by what I couldn't foresee

and in spite of the times
I never really want to come round

You're always with me
when you're not

Lights are up
we're all going to be caught.

Right or Wrong
you're breaking our hearts again.

Wonder what you're
waiting for?

Right or Wrong
you're breaking our hearts again now.

Mysteries missives
not unlike a dream

Sooner or later
we'll be singing for free

Right or Wrong we're breaking
their hearts again now

Right or Wrong we're breaking
their hearts again

Wonder what we're waiting for?

Right or Wrong?
Right or Wrong?

Monday, February 01, 2010

On The Subject of Providence




A good friend of mine and I have an ongoing debate. I believe in the concept of Divine Providence and she resolutely sides with the notion of Synchronicity. To be sure, I understand her reluctance to believe that a higher power sets the course for us and we must follow it to the end whether we wish it or not. Compound this with a thousands wars, repressive movements, and delusional false prophets who asserted then and still maintain firmly and unwaveringly that God wills whatever they are doing, then one can see how many would register strong reservations about the whole idea. I can only counter that though I believe, the guidance I am given is followed faithfully, but not blindly. Still, that is a facet of Providence which I aim to push past in this post and in so doing explore the question of whether God grants us insight and puts in our path instructive means of enhancing our lives---and in so doing increasing our devotion to Him. Those who disagree certainly have the right to express their reservation, but this is what I believe.

There have been numerous instances in my own life that appear upon their face to have been divinely inspired. Most recently, I have consulted my Bible for inspiration and while opening it, almost miraculously, the pages fall open to perhaps the most pertinent and helpful passage I could have ever hoped to find on my own. From time to time, I find a news story embedded in the daily coverage of the day that relates perfectly to some issue I've been pondering for a few days. My friend would call this interesting coincidence or evidence that fervent belief in anything produces an expected and wished for result. I, however, possess a certainty that this is not something so easily discernible. Words fall well short of the mark even beginning to try to explain the feeling I receive that what I have noted was deliberately set out for me. I chalk it up to faith and mystery while appreciate the gift as it is without feeling the compulsion to make an appeal to reason.

Though I am tempted to believe that God placed these ideas before me purely for my own use I also know that one should never discount the notion of simultaneous revelation. The structure and form of the internet, for example, with its way of giving voice and providing the same relatively identical content to millions of people of common interest at one instant often reveals not the ways in which we are different, but rather the ways in which we are similar. Perhaps I need to modify my understanding of the ways God inserts signposts and instruction into my life. We have a tendency to see all things through selfish eyes, including our conception or lack of conception of the ways of the Almighty. Some Christians talk about Jesus as a personal savior and while I understand the immediacy of that construction of language, I notably avoid it, seeking to remind myself that Jesus, much like spiritual guidance, is for all, not just for me. Though religious faith and spirituality of any sort is by its nature a deeply personal matter, I know all too well the problems created when people are covetous of anything they hold of great value, for whatever end.

The parallel I draw in this regard is that of unprogrammed Quaker worship. When Friends feel the Inner Light within them and with it the compulsion to stand, open one's mouths, and give voice to that which has moved them, everyone tries to keep in mind that vocal ministry ought not be only for an individual's own sake, but for the sake of all who are in attendance. Sometimes messages arrive that are not fully formed or are purely designed for one person alone; though they are certainly valid and granted to us from God, those sort of revelations ought not be vocalized in meeting. When I speak or sing, what God compels me to say influences everyone in the room differently. My general intent may be more or less understood by all, but particular passages or word choices frequently have a very specific resonance to each and every person listening in silence. If I open my mouth and begin talking, I have no way of knowing precisely how my words will be received. After finishing my message and returning to my seat, I often contemplate the message as a whole and formulate a rough guess as to what others received from it. Sometimes I am more or less correct, but very often I am proven completely wrong. The next person to speak layers his or her own message onto the basis of what I said, but what moved them is a matter of personal choice.

On Kos or a Kos-based platform, sometimes the diaries I write are received warmly with a tremendous amount of positive feedback. Sometimes they fall upon deaf ears altogether. Sometimes the response is openly hostile and heavily critical. I never know really what to expect. Subsequent diaries influenced by mine often head in one of a million different directions. One precise thought I've written might inspire someone to write a much longer piece on a secondary point my post only grazed across on its way to its own conclusion. This is the nature of human discourse, I recognize, and with it the balance between the subjective and the objective.

One of the complexities of language and words is that while they are concrete means of conveying personal intent, their formulation and construction into sentences and ideas are deeply personal and individual. Language is a means of making abstract thoughts universally comprehensible, granting people the ability to communicate with each other. But there are limitations to any system of symbols and often individual interpretation supersedes group meaning. Anyone who has ever read and analyzed a particularly dense work of poetry knows this well. God might lay a particularly helpful idea, story, or intuition at my feet, but for all I know, He might recognize innately that the very same information is equally helpful to someone else, perhaps in a completely different way. He might assist someone to write a column on the internet, a column that moves me deeply, but it would be quite egocentric of me to believe that those particular words, sentences, and paragraphs are for my benefit alone.

I recognize that the skeptics will always have the means and the willingness to reduce all of this merely to superstition and illogical belief in unseen, unproven forces or to pat, succinct explanations based on their conception of common sense. Even so, I make no apology for what keeps me motivated and frequently energized and with it a desire to live a life for God and not for myself. The world of extreme rationality has always seemed a cold one to me, and I, lover of romance, can not set aside that which has always seemed right, just, and fair. The words I write today may have had their nexus out of a desire to appease the nagging compulsion that dwells within any writer to put down thoughts, but there are times midway through that God grants me particular eloquence or turns of phrase I could have never accomplished myself. I always seek to give credit where credit is due and with it hope and prayer that those who read it might find some comfort and some usefulness. For all I know, God may be instructing you, too.