Here's something else I've been processing. A combination of hypogonadism, plus whatever testicular issue, ovary or otherwise is present, means that I am likely sterile. In some ways, this isn't terribly surprising. Perhaps this is some evolutionary safeguard, ensuring that my DNA can't sully the waters of the gene pool. There's a strong argument to be made that it would be selfish to bring a child into the world with a large likelihood of having several chronic illnesses.
But the mind still conjures up strange thoughts. It thinks about irresponsible human beings who still manage to procreate. It touches on the paradoxes and ironies of life, and the discrepancy between refined thought and biological imperative. We can intellectualize birth, child rearing, and the act of sexual intercourse, but the process itself continues regardless of how we view it. The door is closed. There is no question of waiting for the proper time anymore. But there's a sense of certainty present too, that has been so elusive in other areas of treatment and diagnosis. This is my answer.
Monday, April 18, 2011
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