Epistle of Gathering

Editor's Note,

This Epistle is mine alone and does not speak for the rest of the gathering. It was taken into account by the Epistle Committee, but not approved.

Thanks,

The Author.

______________

And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice--the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. Because of the privilege and authority God has given me, I give each of you this warning: Don't think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us. Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function.

We have experienced an intensity of energy, enthusiasm, and passion that many of us rarely experience in our own monthly meeting. Worship has been unusually powerful, leaving many in attendance wishing that this same deeply moving experience might be transferred and incorporated into every Sunday’s First Hour in their own monthly meeting. With this renewed spiritual focus has come an strong connection with the Spirit and sense of spiritual community that often seems otherwise elusive. We am humbled by the experience and grateful that we have been in attendance.

In Romans 12, we are taught that the Body of Christ includes many parts. In our gathering, each of these parts at times initially resisted finding a common leaning, yet fortunately they recognized that as fellow Friends even their disagreements could be resolved without protracted conflict. The blessedly few moments of tension were gratefully and graciously pushed aside by a moving experience of deep spiritual connection with each other. Though we all might have wounds, we take care to acknowledge them and seek to heal the divisions both within each other and within ourselves.

A Friend shared that the gathering had been “laboring in love”, recognizing that resolving differences was at times difficult, but that even with that, Friends were still willing to continue to engage in communication with each other, even with whom they might strongly disagree. Some Friends were uncomfortable with Christ-centered or God-centered language. Some Friends were uncomfortable with those who did not willingly incorporate such language into their own spirituality. Yet, all were compelled and motivated to continue the dialogue and in so doing heal the part of Body that was broken. That desire was the salvation of the gathering.

Also present among all in attendance was a strong sense of vulnerability and a willingness to be unguarded and honest. Friends believed this was one of the major strengths of the gathering and all in attendance benefited greatly from this display of trust. Present as well was the willingness of Friends to contribute and participate in worship, which made the gathering even richer. Three different types of worship were held, and with that came a wealth of different experiences. This positive discomfort and tension encouraged and nurtured the presence of the Spirit. Despite this sometimes challenging environment, there was nonetheless a strong sense of unity that characterized the gathering as a whole.

Some Friends mentioned that their initial expectations going in were completely different from that which actually transpired, but participants agreed that the experience was overwhelmingly uplifting. The seeds that have been planted from this gathering have yet to blossom, but we have hope that what we learned and experienced here will bear fruit in our own monthly meetings, and well beyond. We came seeking answers, some of which were realized, and some which we will only be granted in the days, weeks, months, and even years going forward.

In Defense of Kansas/Closing Ceremonies

"Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you."- Matthew 7:7

_____________________

I pause to note that I honestly have nothing against the state of Kansas. (Does this mea culpa suffice, Micah? ;-) My reservations initially upon arrival were, I think, a defensive response to being back in a red state. As I think more upon it, I reflect that Kansas is an interesting mix of liberal and conservative. Where we grow up influences how we perceive other places we visit. To be back in a place where there is a church on every corner brings back memories of visiting the small towns where both of my parents grew up. Some of them are positive, some are not.

In particular, it reminds me of my Grandmother, who had been raised Charismatic as a minister's daughter. She suffered from a myriad of chronic health conditions, and wandered from church to church, attempting to find someone who could heal her. My father's skepticism of organized religion, transferred to me in part, arrived from seeing one charlatan after another preach a Godly life on Sunday morning and then prove to be incredibly hypocritical when not in the pulpit. Even to the last years of her life, she would give money to every televangelist on air, much to my father's consternation. If I myself had any slight reservations about this entire conference it was a brief moment whereby I was told, once again, that the only way to the Father was through Jesus Christ.

Don't get me wrong. I'm totally down with the Jesus. But I'm not willing to disown my friends and my Friends who do not believe that a belief in Jesus alone is the only way to salvation. This debate caused a bit of a minor stir during Bible study, though I pause to note that the parties involved were not Young Friends, but rather were older adult here to observe. Based on what I deal with at my own home meeting, I have to say I'm tremendously surprised by this. This issue was dealt with, successfully I think, at last night's evening worship. It was the only moment of mild drama in an otherwise convivial and welcoming gathering.

A side note. My camera has an unfortunate habit of draining batteries, and since I have been more or less based here, I haven't had the opportunity to go well out of my way to get more. Still, the trip over and the first day of the gathering has, I think, been sufficiently documented.

I am in no hurry this afternoon to jump back in the car and drive all the way back to DC. The plan is to see if we can manage it all in one go, though that is going to be exhausting. Assuming we can even pull it off, we'll leave around 2 pm local time and arrive sometime in the mid morning tomorrow. Though I don't have a tremendous amount of money to spare, I'd be willing to pay for a cheap motel at some point halfway there.

Belated Quote of the Week

"That old man with the burning eyes actually believes that there can be such a thing as the brotherhood of man. And that's not the funniest part of it. As long as he's around I believe it myself."- Heywood Broun, speaking about Eugene V. Debs

Sunday Update

I don't have a lot of time to blog today, but I thought I'd provide a brief update. The church has wifi, but it's not particularly strong. There is internet service in the dorms, but one must have a cable to access it, and I got there too late to get one.

The conference is packed full of places to go, meaning I have to carve out odd moments between each of them to blog. What I will say is that last night I finally got settled in and slept eight blessed hours. This conference has been very welcoming and supportive, but with so many passionate people, it is frequently intense. I wish that my own meeting in DC was so spiritually satisfying. Not that I mind intensity at all, but after a time it begins to drain me. For example, in evening worship I felt compelled to share a message in song. As I finished, I collapsed into my seat, utterly spent. Some in the gathering were concerned for me, but I was merely just overwhelmed by all that I had heard, seen, and experienced.

I was hoping to provide a much more thorough update from day to day, but I simply haven't had the time. By the end, I promise a much lengthier update. Tomorrow is the last day of the gathering, and we'll meet together until lunch. After lunch we will depart, and I am trying not to think about the length of the drive in front of me. We're going to try to drive all the way without stopping, which is going to be quite challenging.

Greeting from Wichita!

My apologies for not writing sooner. Twenty-one hours in a car spread over two full days and four hours sleep meant that I arrived feeling punch-drunk and sleep deprived. We drove 14 hours the first day and took a break outside St. Louis, whereby I only managed to toss and turn my way to around four hours sleep. Today I got a bit more rest, though in truth I am still not entirely where I need to be. Even before I was diagnosed, I always had to have several hours uninterrupted sleep to fully recharge. Now I know that doing so absolutely essential to my health.

First impression are these: I really thought I had left behind the Bible Belt when I moved from Alabama, but I’d have to say that Kansas is even more conservative than the South. Of course, this shouldn't really surprise me. This is the very same city where abortion doctor George Tiller was gunned down not long ago. I can understand why. While on the journey out here, we passed sign after sign imploring motorists to repent or face eternal damnation. The number of churches and roadside crosses is fairly staggering, I must say, which is really saying something based on my region of origin. Recently the Quaker church here which has served as our home base of sorts has been the victim of vandalism and theft, both to the building itself and to cars parked outside in the lot. Though this sort of behavior has been excused as a product of teenage hooligans, I wonder if there is some correlation between the Tiller killing, because this gathering is clearly much more liberal than the rest of the city and state. After all, Tiller was killed inside his own church.

We’re being housed on the grounds of a Quaker university which goes by the name of Friends University. It is a small private liberal arts college. I’ve been told it features an excellent music, ballet, and oddly, zoo science program, as well as one or two other strengths. This is fairly typical with colleges and universities of this size. The student dorms, which is where we bunk for the night, are very nice, no older than five or six years old. They are set up not unlike a motel, with six beds are housed in one suite. The air conditioning wasn't working in my room last night, meaning everyone else fled for one that did. I relish the opportunity to have more or less my own space, so I stayed in the room to which I was originally assigned.

Even in my reduced state of efficiency, I was still able to write a Feminist critique, which I've posted here before this entry. I've also taken several pictures, which I fully intend to post on my Flickr stream when I get back to DC. They will also be posted here by mid-week. I'll try to post a bit more throughout the day, though I'll be in workshops and small group activities most of my waking hours.

Check Your Whole Way of Going About It

When I first began to frequent Feminist gatherings, I was eager to help and proud to be a newly minted male ally. However, I also had to start at the very beginning, much as everyone else does. My own personal women’s/gender studies 101 class was in large part an organic process of self-reflection, listening, and observation more than an academic exercise. So, in my ignorance, I made statements at times that were not especially feminist and to be sure, I was certainly swiftly corrected by many.

“Check your privilege, check your privilege, check your privilege.” It was like a mantra, and a particularly infuriating one for me at the time. Back then, I didn’t really understand what that statement meant in totality. Whether by intent or design, it felt like an admonishment, which was especially perplexing because I certainly hadn’t intended to be mean or divisive. After all, it takes just as much effort for a well-meaning male to deconstruct Patriarchal inequality within himself as is does for a woman to do so within herself in a different way. That what I say begins from a position of unequal power is important, certainly, and so are the ways I profit from it, but it doesn’t detract from the process I had to undergo to really “get” why what I said was so problematic.

As a fellow feminist Quaker pointed out to me the other day, we might ought to consider that, not forsaking our zeal, when calling out offending viewpoints, we would be sure to add the crucial caveat, “privilege is not your fault.” This should not and does not absolve any person automatically granted a degree of autonomy over another from their complicity in the matter, whether actively or passively, but it might go miles towards eliminating hostility and bruised feelings. I’ve always felt male guilt or white guilt or heterosexual guilt is counterproductive past a certain point. If it encourages people to look inside themselves and reform their conduct, then well and good.

Regarding what our response might be, I will say that no one needs to be babied or placated, but it has been my experience that such attitudes repel male allies and even some women from taking a more active role in the greater movement. Indeed, had I not been so stubbornly compelled to stay with it, no matter what criticism I received, I may very well have been the latest to leave and never return.

It seems to me as though we don’t want to concede even an inch in this area. Acknowledging that discussions of privilege might contain grey areas might not be so comforting, but neither is it comforting to realize how maddeningly inexact is our conception of gender. Furthermore, we certainly reject those who claim we‘re all just a bunch of miserable man-haters, and yet we harshly condemn in our own way those among us who espouse our own particularly forbidden heretical notions. The hard-liners among us draw razor-sharp distinctions, fearful that Patriarchal attitudes will never change if anyone sees the fight as anything more than a struggle between absolute good and absolute, entirely corrupting, shape-shifting evil.

But when we do this, we forget that sympathy isn’t a weakness. Indeed, it is the means by which we share our common humanity and our common imperfections. As a person of faith, I myself try to hate the sin and love the sinner. I recognize this to be a challenging undertaking, but coming from a Feminist standpoint, it might do us well to be less reactive and more understanding. To be sure, there will always be trolls, both in real life and online, who will spew hateful points of view purely to try to make us upset. That they can and will do it so easily should give us all reason to take pause. If we remain reactive then we take the bait, stirring ourselves into a frenzy over and over again. Speaking about myself, anger has never taken me anywhere especially helpful, but I do know that the best way to combat a contentious person is to not respond, nor engage, no matter how much he or she tries to provoke. I find this to be true in Progressive political groups as much as Progressive religious/spiritual gatherings, and the adage “don’t feed the troll” might be the best advice we could ever possibly take to heart.

And just as it is a process of introspection to take our own privilege into account, so too is being self-aware enough to recognize from whence our own reactivity stems. We know that a certain amount of anger drives us and keeps us fighting, but there is a difference between instructive anger and destructive anger. Open hostility, once stoked, has a tendency to spiral out of control into very unhelpful, unhealthy directions. Unprogrammed Quaker worship encourages all Friends gathered to minister, and thus the floor is open to those who feel the leading of the Light. At times, Friends will give messages in active worship which are offensive on all sorts of levels. If I were to rise and speak immediately, in direct response, my messages would not be Spirit-led. They would instead speak from myself and likely arrive from annoyance, disgust, or even rage. If, however, I chose to wait a bit longer in expectant silence, my initial anger will often guide me towards a message that is clearly inspired by the Divine. If I choose to stand and speak, I know that based on cautious, careful discernment what I say will not inflame the situation further.

Being tough, independent, self-reliant, and Feminist does not necessarily require one to shout the loudest, shame the enemy with the best putdown, or constantly correct the misinformed. It may run contrary to how we think of ourselves and our opposition, but I my own hope is that we might get to a point someday where we might seek to enlighten first, not to return fire towards those who call us names or even co-opt our positions and our very name itself for their own ends. I am a believer in free will, and I know that so long as we assume that Patriarchy is a wack-a-mole enemy that will always morph into something different and just as virulent as that which came before it, then we’ll never believe that people might make a conscious decision to reject that ultimately destructive attitude wholesale. People can change, certainly, and I think sometimes we give Patriarchy too much credit. I don’t think it’s nearly as powerful as we think it is. We may project our own fears onto it, believing that our struggle is arduous and close to impossible, but so long as we don’t entertain the possibility that what we seek is within our grasp, then we have already set ourselves up for failure. When I grabbed my sword to fight for Feminism, I did so with the expectation that I might someday set it down for good.

Saturday Video

Seeking Clarity Before I Depart

In a few minutes, I'll be on my way to the YAF Gathering. We should have been underway already but our ride is a good two hours late. Hence, this is reason why I am frequently averse to last minute road trip plans. They nearly always arrive with unforeseen complications. I'm trying not to complain too much, but if I had known that we wouldn't be underway until 9, I wouldn't have had to rise at 5 this morning and rush to get ready in time to catch a bus that arrived at 6:10 a.m.

Tonight I'll be crashing at the home of a Friend in Missouri, slightly outside of St. Louis. We'll wake up early tomorrow morning and drive into Wichita, since we need to be on site between 3 and 5 p.m. in time to register. I have six days worth of clothes with me, along with all the other amenities, plus bedsheets and towels, since neither will be provided once there. We'll be staying at student dorms in a Quaker university, hence the reason for the spartan accommodations. In many ways, I suppose it's like staying in a hostel.

Assuming I'm not too exhausted and wireless is available, I'll try to update later tonight.

Final Thoughts Before YAF 2010 Gathering

On this, my last full day in DC before I head out to Young Adult Friends Gathering 2010, I am taking to time to run last minute errands, tie up loose ends, and otherwise prepare myself. For this reason, I'll break my unwritten rule and allow the subject of this post to be primarily autobiographical. Once settled in after a long journey, subsequent posts will center around my observations and thoughts regarding the conference, which means more God talk for those receptive to it.

Tomorrow morning I rise at an ungodly hour and begin what will be an exhausting, two day trip by car to get to Topeka, Kansas. Rest assured, I am excited about what lies ahead, though I am not exactly sure what to expect. When a member of another faith group, conferences I attended were almost exclusively comprised of fellow liberals. This gathering will include Quakers from every branch---the very conservative on one end, to the very liberal on the other end. While I am glad that an effort has been made to extend a hand of fellowship and community to those likely to have a completely different worldview than my own, I recognize also that this may present significant challenges. The format of worship, for example, has been carefully designed to strike a compromise between each group. Conflict resolution and building alliances with others is a life skill I know will do me much good to learn, but there's a hopefully understandable part of me who enjoys living in the Progressive, protective bubble I've crafted for myself.

As I've alluded to at other sites, I'm taking part in some very intensive therapy right now. Those of you who read this blog frequently have seen the burnt edges and the residual impact, and many people have recognized that there was something going on. Always an open person, sometimes even to a fault, the process has required me to confront parts of myself, my identity, and my past that even I never felt comfortable vocalizing until now. If I were an album right now, I'd be some combination of John Lennon/Plastic Ono Band and Joni Mitchell's Blue. It is said that when the latter artist previewed the master recordings for a close friend, the friend's advice was "Joni, keep some of this for yourself!" Fortunately for us she chose to ignore that advice and if dispensed to me, I would do the same.

Keeping secrets never did me much good. Most of the time they made me worse. By this, of course, I mean destructive secrets. It is for that reason that I quickly get exasperated and judgmental when confronted with people who either can't, don't, or won't be honest with themselves and their problems. I suppose I want to help people, and there is a severe limit to what anyone can do to help a person who keeps silent. The example I turn to now is that of a fellow musician, an acquaintance, who has been going through a Twelve Step program. What prompted said musician to get more actively involved was when I, introducing an original song, shared its true inspiration and meaning.

At face value, the song seems to be about a narrator expressing anger and betrayal at a lover. In reality, I was writing about life with a chronic illness, bipolar disorder. Sometimes it really seems as though my limitations are an actual human being with whom I have a contentious relationship. But this concept, metaphorically speaking, has pretty much been my Modus Opperandi over the course of my life. Some will submerge their thoughts in their art in cryptic fashion, and some will, like me, get right up to the surface and not quite have the courage to poke my head above water. Creatively speaking, there might be a virtue in this sort of set up, but from a health standpoint, it's not the best coping strategy every devised. I know this now.

In any case, I now conclude. My sincere hope is that this gathering will provide me a new perspective badly needed and that I will add a unique voice to the proceedings.

Hey Mr. Reporter

In solidarity with Feministing, Feminists, recording artists, activists, and pretty much everyone else who has been taken out of context or otherwise misquoted by the media.

Fishing Strategies for the Future

Several of the disciples were there--Simon Peter, Thomas (nicknamed the Twin), Nathanael from Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zebedee, and two other disciples. "I'm going out to fish," Simon Peter told them, and they said, "We'll go with you." So they went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing. But when the day was now breaking, Jesus stood on the beach; yet the disciples did not know that it was Jesus.

Jesus asked them, "Friends, haven't you caught any fish?" They answered him, "No, we haven't." He told them, "Throw the net on the right hand side of the boat, and you'll catch some." So they threw it out and were unable to haul it in because it was so full of fish.

That disciple whom Jesus kept loving said to Peter, "It's the Lord!" When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put his clothes back on, because he was practically naked, and jumped into the sea. The others stayed with the boat and pulled the loaded net to the shore, for they were only about a hundred yards from shore. So when they got out on the land, they saw a charcoal fire already laid and fish placed on it, and bread.

"Bring some of the fish you've just caught," Jesus said. So Simon Peter went aboard and hauled the net ashore, full of large fish, 153 of them. And although there were so many, the net was not torn.

_________________

A fellow Friend writes about whether Quakerism can adapt to the changes of a new age, namely the fact we are far more inclined to uproot and relocate than we were in a previous era. He posits whether we are capable pushing back against prevailing trends in an effort to reverse them, concerned that our complicity in all of this constant back-and-forth isn't just detrimental to the Religious Society of Friends, but also to the stability of the planet and the people who live there. Quakers aren't the only faith group feeling the pinch, knowing they must evolve or die, but in the process not knowing quite how to do it. Trends and statistics only underscore the seriousness of the situation.

Even so, precise location, I find, makes a significant difference. Living in Washington, DC, has provided me significant challenges, particularly concerning my efforts to maintain a strong and active Young Adult Friends group. The culture of the city encourages career-driven peripateticism and having studied the history of the area, I have had to concede that it has been this way for a very long time. Established precedent is difficult to roll back once enacted. To some degree, the situation that faces me is not much dissimilar to that of maintaining a college organization like the Young Democrats, one which is always in a state of flux. As I think back on my time as an undergraduate, I am always amazed at how quickly four years passed.

In this example, every year a new slate of members enters the picture in the fall as incoming Freshman, and every spring outgoing Seniors graduate and head elsewhere. This dynamic is also present in any group with an age requirement, like Young Adult Friends, whereby members routinely age out. Establishing a firm change of command while I can and designating new leaders well before it comes time to formerly pass the baton is what I strive to maintain. Though the YAF clerk and I understandably take the most active role regarding organization and structure, we do seek out members who we hope will take over when we ourselves no longer identify as young adults.

In this city, my contemporaries move here knowing full well that this will not be their final stop on a metaphorical train trip towards a greater occupational goal. At most, they may be here for four years of college, but then it's off to grad school elsewhere, or to a job wherever they can get it. In this day and age, with the job market as unsettled and limited as it is, I find that even Young Adult Friends who would like to stay around have no choice but to opt for relocation. Those who are fortunate enough to get a job in a different city of course take it, but many Young Adults, to say nothing of Young Friends choose to enroll in grad school in the hopes that doing so might make them more marketable to employers. With that decision is also the hope that moving forward towards some greater goal, even if it means living off student loans and ascribing to a life consumed by study and ascetic poverty is better than spinning one's wheels in frustration, going nowhere.

Growing up in Birmingham, Alabama, as I did provided me a very different perspective. Most people who moved there from other places intended to stay for a long while, and the natives who stuck around after high school or college around felt much the same way. Those desperate for greener pastures like me left, likely never to return, except perhaps to visit. In smaller cities and small towns, this same compulsion to leap-frog from place to place does not exist in the same proportion. Certain professions insist upon constant relocation. Academia, non-profit work, activism, and politics are all fields that demand one change ZIP codes on a frequent basis. Many Friends, particularly liberal unprogrammed Friends, are employed in these sorts of occupations so it makes sense why they rarely are in the same place for long. The red state/blue state divide also factors into the equation, since a more traditional conception of lifestyle runs contrary to that of the average urban professional.

One of the reasons I have embraced internet activism is because it renders physical location more or less redundant. To be sure, there will always be a need for personal interaction, but since we are increasingly more and more tethered to electronic communication, there's a sort of immediacy present online that is very useful. While one way of life may be ending, another seems to have sprung up in its place. I certainly understand the worries of those who feel we may be incautiously scrapping what existed for centuries and in so doing destroying forever a system that has accomplished an incredible amount of good. At times this fear is my very own, but I also recognize that the internet has been an amazing pallet for creative expression. Speaking in a purely spiritual context, I have seen my views validated and confirmed by people I would otherwise never have met or encountered in person, regardless of whether I was twenty-five at the time or eighty-five.

Do I visualize the cyber-meeting or cyber-church replacing a gathering of people in a physical setting? No, not really. To me, at least, there will always be a role and place for it. But what I do envision is that internet-based community will strengthen the bonds of common cause and unity among fellow believers. I see it as a supremely helpful resource and in many ways analogous to the small group model that has been practiced by many individual faith gatherings for the past several years. Some ideal mix between ground-based and internet-based worship seems to me the most sensible solution. Religious minorities, among which Quakers are merely one example, have developed novel solutions to challenges over the years. In an age well before electronic communication, certain faith groups extended a hand to members and attenders who were unable to attend weekly gatherings. Because of physical limitations or due to the fact that they lived in remote parts of the country where gatherings were miles away, these worshipers opted to receive devotional material in the mail. I think a similar model can be utilized in this circumstance, too, and certainly not simply as an outreach to the disabled, the shut-in, or the isolated.

Micah's post focused particularly on retaining that which we have. I agree with him that doing so is very important. But I find a particular leaning and calling to extend a hand out to those who have never heard of Quakerism beyond a face on a box of oatmeal, or the name of a street. The internet could not be a more effective tool to accomplish this. My own talents lend me to embrace what we have rather than devise a strategy that, to me, is akin to swimming upstream. If we accept that, at least for right now, maintaining lasting membership and attendance in any meeting or church might be unfeasible, then I'd rather find a way to reach outside the existing structure to cast my net on a different side of the boat. In so doing, I might find myself with more fish than I had ever dreamed.

Quote of the Week

"If you admit that to silence your opponent by force is to win an intellectual argument, then you admit the right to silence people by force."- Hans Eysenck

Saturday Video

Mountain of Regret

I'm Not a Feminist, But It's Okay if I Am to You

Originally Posted on Feministing Community

I am a big fan of the British singer-songwriter Holly Golightly. The other day, while scouring YouTube for interview clips, I came across a brief question and answer session originally aired on German television. In heavily accented English, the interviewer concludes the segment by asking something that, to this audience, will seem all too familiar.

Interviewer: As a woman [performer], do you [take] a Feminist stance?

Golightly: That's quite interesting. I don't think of myself as being a militant feminist in any sense of the word. I think what I've done is the best that I could do, according to my ability, irrespective of sex. The [songs] that have always interested me--women played a very big part in [them] and had a lot to do with production and writing, but [they] were not credited. This was something that was quite difficult for women to do, to really extend into, because it was a man's world. The music industry, per se, was a man's world, and still is, largely.

I think when you talk about Feminism, the fact that I just get up and do it---if people would like to say that I'm a Feminist by virtue of the fact that I do it and have done it independently, then that's good. If it's influenced someone, then that's good.

____________________

I believe the interviewer was attempting to allude to her lyrics and stage presence in asking the question, both of which are frequently tough, uncompromising, no-nonsense, and yes, even badass. Regarding Feminist identity, Golightly takes an odd position, making sure first to note that she isn't seen as a "militant" feminist, another example of the stereotype we have tried so hard to change. And yet, she is also not uncomfortable being labeled as a feminist by those who might find her lyrics and music inspiring. I will say that I personally think Golightly is a feminist, even if she herself would rather I form that conclusion for myself.

We've certainly sought to embrace other female musicians who are squeamish about being feminist, but certainly display Feminist stances through their art in any case. One wonders if "feminist by any other name" is the best we can do sometimes. Or, to look at it another way, I think about the number of unsubstantiated historical figures that are embraced as queer in LGBT circles. Many of these people lived such heavily closeted lives that uncovering indisputable proof of their true sexual orientation might always be a topic for debate. Discerning a queer identity, much like discerning a feminist identity, often feels somewhat like interpreting a poem. One can make educated guesses, but only the author knows the complete truth.

Memories passed

now are
landmarks

in a game of
orienteering for sport
pointing towards directions
we once traversed

a goal to be reached
on a long delayed

imaginary journey
directly due west

Odd twists and
turns towards
Ponce

But unlike a
fountain of youth

I am in search of a
fountain of peace.

Why Washington is Broken (A Resident's Perspective)

(Click to embiggen)

Last night, voters rejected the Washington, DC, establishment, signaling an electorate eager to take out its anger on political insiders of both parties. Channeling dissatisfaction with the nation's capital has long been the meal ticket for candidates espousing a strong populist streak. Such is the nature of this election cycle. Having established that, I thought I might try to add my own perspective as to why Washington runs the way it does. Close to a year spent here has given me ample opportunity to observe many of its idiosyncrasies and quirks. While I have certainly not been privy to the private world of the federal government, I have experienced a multitude of other meetings, gatherings, and functions which have inadvertently or deliberately mirrored that of the seat of power.

Politics on a national level, as evidenced by last night, is frequently a contentious, painful process predicated on constant conflict. Within the political process, this might be seen as a necessary evil, but it simply doesn't stop there. Instead, it seeps into other established entities in the city, often tainting good intentions along the way. The paradox in place is that, the way the system has been set up, unless this consistent friction exists, true change and reform will never come to pass. Still, this setup has been the undoing of many organizations with noble intentions who were utterly unraveled by in-fighting. Sustained fisticuffs have a way of wearing down even the most idealistic of reformers. It's one thing to be a spectator, but something quite different to be a prize fighter.

Especially problematic is the fact that the District itself, as well as the surrounding suburbs are closely tied to the military and to politics, two occupations which require frequent relocation. The transitory nature of the city itself frustrates any sense of continuity. Without a stable core, no one hangs around long enough to really address problematic issues. Indeed, it has taken a full year for me to properly orient myself enough to be able to speak with any sort of authority in writing this to you. That which I discovered for myself was not written down, nor did anyone trouble themselves to explain it to me. Rather, this was something I had to learn through observation and interrogatives.

To return to the subject at hand, since DC is home to so much in-flow, out-flow, sufficient inroads cannot be made in so short a time. As such, an inner core of long-time residents who have set down roots and are there to stay constantly compete against short-time residents. Washingtonians with a degree of seniority are reluctant to extend a hand of friendship or cooperation to newer transplants, primarily because so many are merely serving a tour of duty and will leave very soon. To a very large degree, this entire description might as well describe Congress as a whole. Washington, regardless of station and intent, is for many a way station, or perhaps only a couple years spent in occupational Purgatory.

Every city has its own character. Washington, DC, is a city which takes itself quite seriously. It should be noted that, in all fairness, any large city has a serious tendency to navel-gaze regarding its own idealized conception of self. As for DC, a metropolitan area which regularly attracts its fair share of celebrities, big wigs, and names to be dropped later, possesses a certain inferiority complex regarding the other cities up and down the Northeast corridor. The degree of social climbing and with it a desperation to be seen as significant speaks to the structure of the city itself. The post-war boom transformed what had been a sleepy, Southern town into a major metropolitan area. In some ways, DC has been playing catch-up ever since and does not believe that other cities in the region have ever given it the respect it deserves.

Lamentably, this only fosters testiness, suspicion, and frostiness among many. In many ways, such behavior is a kind of defensive reaction, developed among those who deal with crises and intensity on a regular basis. Washington is a fine place for a drama queen, but not for those who love peace and quiet. At some point, this sort of reflexive expectation becomes self-reinforcing, meaning that people begin to assume that the only way to get anything accomplished is to be as contentious and uncompromising as possible. This isn't exactly the best strategy to undertake in order to build community and mutual trust. Those with shields out and at the ready at all moments take a while to be convinced why they ought to lay them aside for a while.

Regardless of what anyone says, Washington, DC, has always been heavily partisan, has always been a battleground, and has always courted heavy artillery. This doesn't just stop with politics. The city itself bears lasting scars, both literal and metaphorical. Many of these are recent, relatively speaking. The assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., touched off a series of destructive riots that severely damaged large sections of the District. Even with recent gentrification, many locations have yet to fully recover. With the riots meant an increasing white flight away from the district into Northern Virginia. The Vietnam War meant years of wearying wave-after-wave of protests. The late 80's and early 90's saw the District win the ignoble distinction of murder capital of the country. Any city serving as the focal point of what is still a very affluent and populous country would have borne the burden of collective frustration. That which was true then is true now.

How does one reform Washington? A good question, though men and women much wiser than you or me have never been able to put Humpty Dumpty back together again. The most accurate statement of all might be that Washington, DC was always broken. A DC-area Quaker coined a saying back in the 50's to address this very same issue. "Seek not to contest with evil, lest ye be taken by the spirit of contention, rather concern yourself with goodness." Perhaps it depends on your innate temperament. If you fancy yourself a knife-fighter, you'll always find a battle to appeal to your lust of blood. But, if you want to facilitate peace and an end to dysfunction and strife, I think taking the high ground might be a far better option. As I think you can see, politics doesn't just exist in a vacuum. It is so pervasive and influential that it penetrates every group of human beings living in close proximity. If politics could formulate its own specific code of conduct, that would be one thing, but as I have tried to illustrate, it never stops there.

Today's WTF Moment

In deciding what I am to write about from day to day, I read through a variety of news sources. It was much to my dismay to uncover this story, which is so unbelievably offensive that words nearly fail me at the moment. As a native of Birmingham, I can tell you that the high school referenced in the story I've included below is located in a working class, conservative, predominately white, rural, unincorporated community. That an indefensibly stupid act by a schoolteacher would be found here of all places isn't a tremendous surprise to me. The offense itself, however, is so brazen and inexcusable on all kinds of levels. It sends my blood pressure through the roof to contemplate that local residents are willing to treat it like it's no big deal. Yes, it's no big deal to invoke Presidential assassination for the sake of making a point in class.

A Jefferson County, Alabama, teacher picked the wrong example when he used as­sassinating President Bar­ack Obama as a way to teach angles to his geome­try students.


Someone alerted autho­rities and the Corner High School math teacher was questioned by the Secret Service, but was not taken into custody or charged with any crime.



"We did not find a credible threat," said Roy Sex­ton, special agent in charge of Birmingham's Secret Service office. "As far as the Secret Service is concerned, we looked into it, we talked to the gentleman and we have closed our investigation."

Corner High geometry teacher picked the wrong example, President Barack Obama, to use in a lesson on angles. The lesson resulted in a Secret Service investigation. Sexton said he generally doesn't discuss threat cases, but confirmed his of­fice investigated the inci­dent. No federal charges followed the probe.



The teacher was appar­ently teaching his geometry students about parallel lines and angles, officials said. He used the example of where to stand and aim if shooting Obama.



"He was talking about angles and said, 'If you're in this building, you would need to take this angle to shoot the president,'" said Joseph Brown, a senior in the geometry class.



I'm not sure what else there is add to that. The story doesn't provide enough additional information to merit much additional speculation without entering the world of baseless conjecture, but what did transpire is offensive enough.

Efforts to reach the teacher for comment Mon­day were unsuccessful.

 Superintendent Phil Hammonds said the teacher remains at work, and there are no plans for termination.



"We are going to have a long conversation with him about what's appropriate," Hammonds said. "It was extremely poor judgment on his part, and a poor choice of words."



Caroline Polk, the parent of a ninth-grader at the school, said she doesn't be­lieve the teacher ought to be fired.



"We all make mistakes, and we should be able to learn from our mistakes," she said. "What he said was just wrong and inappropri­ate. Everyone's got their own opinions, but we have to be aware of our sur­roundings. At this point, it just needs to be handled in a way that it won't be re­peated."

Yes, imagine the outcry if the teacher had alluded to the assassination of George W. Bush. Imagine the right-wing spin machine on Fox News. Perhaps this formerly fine upstanding citizen was a secret Al-Qaeda operative! He deserves to be sent to Gitmo! We all know he was indoctrinating our children with his evil demonic left-wing radical propaganda! Lock him up and throw away the key!

Not a peep out of them this morning. I wonder why.

Troubling the Language

Editor's Note:

I wrote this originally for a Quaker audience, but would like to share this with you as well. I've added a few notes in the text to aid the comprehension of those who are not Friends. I've also expanded the message to include those who are not people of faith.

Thanks,

The Author.

Those who have studied it, even informally, recognize that the Gospel of John is a problematic book on all sorts of levels. The last Gospel written chronologically, many scholars now believe it was, in fact, not written by a direct observer of Jesus' ministry on Earth. It is a difficult book to reconcile with the rest of the Gospels, and I admit I usually steer clear of it for the most part. Certain verses and passages are helpful and some among the most cited in the entire canon, but much about its historical veracity has been called into question over the years as well. And in that spirit, many people are unaware that most modern translations omit certain verses in each of the Gospels that were believed to have been added not in the First Century, but much later, usually by Medieval writers. Yet, since later, not earlier manuscripts formed the King James version, they nonetheless became part of Bible tradition.

One such verse is John 5:4, which rendered in the original King James reads,

For an angel went down at a certain season into the pool, and troubled the water: whosoever then first after the troubling of the water stepped in was made whole of whatsoever disease he had.

From this verse Friends derived the phrase "troubling the water" to mean the process of, if you will, rocking the boat to achieve a positive end, an undertaking set about to bring forth needed reforms and spiritual renewal. Though the immediate emotional response might be uncomfortable, the inevitable end is positive and facilitates growth. Here the disabled residents of Jerusalem lay by a pool named Bethesda. Depending on how one interprets the verse, either an actual Angel disturbed the water, a miracle which cured the very first person to enter the pool, or this was simply a story believed by those in attendance. We all know that truth often depends upon those who believe it, not whether or not it is actually real. We also know that the brain is a very malleable organ, and that it's far easier than one might think to open our minds up to any idea or belief. Moreover, this verse, even with its dubious veracity, was later transformed into something quite helpful, quite sacred, and quite necessary.

One finds reference to it in the old slave spiritual, "Wade in the Water". Since Quakers were absolutely essential to the establishment and maintenance of the Underground Railroad, I'm certain this song bears our hand print somewhere along the line. But Quakers weren't the only people instrumental in opposing slavery and devising means to dismantle it, brick by brick.

Wade in the water (children)
Wade in the water
Wade in the water
God's gonna trouble the water

If you don't believe I've been redeemed
God's gonna trouble the water
I want you to follow him on down to Jordan stream
(I said) My God's gonna trouble the water

You know chilly water is dark and cold
(I know my) God's gonna trouble the water
You know it chills my body but not my soul
(I said my) God's gonna trouble the water

(Come on let's) wade in the water
Wade in the water (children)
Wade in the water
God's gonna trouble the water

Now if you should get there before I do
(I know) God's gonna trouble the water
Tell all my friends that I'm comin' too
(I know) God's gonna trouble the water

Sometimes I'm up, Lord, and sometimes I'm down
(You know my) God's gonna trouble the water
Sometimes I'm level to the ground
God's gonna trouble the water
(I Know) God's gonna trouble the water

Wade in the water (children)
Wade out in the water (children)
God's gonna trouble the water

As with so many of these spirituals, much of the language is coded and not meant to be taken strictly literally. Designed to fly over the heads of suspicious slave owners and overseers, the song talks about the initial adversity of running away, while alluding to the ultimate benefit of securing freedom in the North. Troubling the water, in this instance, took the form of opposing the peculiar institution, a practice which only came to an end after a Civil War. Yet, there are many other instances where activists, regardless of their religious convictions, have troubled the water for the sake of progress.

Because I came from a Christ-centered tradition, I still find it odd that, when so much Friendly terminology has clear Biblical antecedents, many have drifted completely away from the Scriptures. As I read my Bible, I smile as I recognize the roots of some Testimony or some saying of George Fox, our founder. A recent discussion board posting on a Friendly site about the role of language in Quaker circles reminded me again of how conscious early Friends were in shaping unique and specific words, phrases, and overarching postulates---many of which are still in constant usage. There is a whole world of Quaker speak, and those who set it out did so deliberately and exactingly, in accordance with what they believed and to conform to the teachings and leanings of the faith.

Speaking directly to all Progressives, I pose this question. Should we, with a doff of the hat to our pioneers, follow in their footsteps to remake ourselves over, or should we reverently maintain a sense of linguistic continuity, even when it might dangerously tread towards ritual? (Quakers are opposed to ritual, but I find many Progressives are as well) I myself believe that not all tradition is a bad thing, but I do also acknowledge that there comes a time where we must remove the rust and dust that has accumulated with disuse for the sake of survival. As Progressives, what beliefs and which words that summarize these beliefs do we find sacrosanct, and which require periodic revision? Are certain words and phrases themselves so offensive that they must be scrapped altogether? Do we, instead, have a need to preserve language for the sake of grounding us to the past while reverently honoring the hard work of those who came before us? We like to say that in liberal circles we have no purity tests for membership, but often we do.

Perhaps the key then is to tread that middle ground and leave strict purity in any sense alone. Though John 5:4 may not have been written in the First Century A.D., this verse nonetheless influenced Friends to coin a very useful phrase which describes a very specific, very necessary activity. Had it not been passed down over the century, slaves and abolitionists would not have been able to use it to liberate those in bondage. Words mean so much, whether they arrive one by one, or in bunches. Who knows which words or words were so inspirational that they granted the courage to act in their hearers. Had even one or two words been different, then, for all we know, it might have meant the difference between bondage and freedom, oppression and liberation. I think at times we understate the power of language and both its collective and individual impact.

I've always believed that language is a living document and that we have a duty, both as citizens and as a society, in determining meaning. This goes well beyond our status as Friends or Progressives or activists and influences every imaginable identity, role, or decision we make. The words we use to describe ourselves are the same words others use to describe us, and our role in the matter is not a passive one. May we then trouble the language with active, not passive voice.

Quote of the Week

"Even if a unity of faith is not possible, a unity of love is."- Hans Urs von Balthasar